There are times when I become discouraged. Thoughts steal their way into my mind, like crafty sower searching for fertile soil wherein to sow his spurious seed.

• Am I really making a difference in my neighbourhood? It's so big and I'm so small.
• If God hears all of my prayers, why aren't more people getting saved faster?
• Is anyone's life really different because of Christ living in me, or am I just kidding myself?
• Wouldn't it be easier to just go back to where I came from and get a normal job like everyone else?
• Can I really rely on God to pull me through these times? Things just seem so difficult - do I trust enough?

These thoughts are seeds sown by the evil one in cooperation with my sinful nature with the purpose of taking root in my life and bearing wicked fruit, fruit that looks like this:

• sexual immorality
• impure thoughts
• eagerness for lustful pleasure
• idolatry
• participation in demonic activities
• hostility
• quarreling
• jealousy
• outbursts of anger
• selfish ambition
• divisions
• the feeling that everyone is wrong except those in your own little group
• envy
• drunkenness
• wild parties

(from Galatians 5:19-21)

Now I don't know about you, but these sinful ways are not as far away from my everyday behaviour as I would like to believe. The evidence of even one of those results listed above in my life indicates that somewhere along the line, I have allowed the evil one to sow a seed of deception within me and it has taken root and I have fed it by coming into agreement with it, contemplating it, and perhaps even trying to convince others to buy into it. This leads me into misery and the Word says that anyone living this sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

That's serious stuff.

The Scriptural guard against the deceitful sower is this:

"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:5

That means that every thought, every argument, every pretense that currently exists in my mind that opposes the truth of God MUST be demolished. Torn down completely. Done away with entirely. As well, to avoid new growth, every thought that enters my mind that does not align itself with what God says is true and right must be taken captive and made obedient to Christ.

I imagine this to look like an undercover enemy spy who has made his way into my headquarters with the mission of setting off a string of explosives, ensuring my total destruction. If my sensors (Holy Spirit and Word of God) are on, the spy can be discovered and then taken as a prisoner of war and led to the ultimate authority, who is Christ and forced to submit to Him. Victory!
When satan plants the idea in my head that I am not making a difference here in the downtown eastside, and I may as well go back to who I was 3 years ago, instead of mulling it over and deciding for myself whether or not that is truth, I must seize this thought immediately, keep it under tight control and bring it right to Jesus, where He can speak the truth. When the truth comes, the lie is exposed and loses its power. What truth does Jesus speak to the lie that I am not making a difference as a Christian? He simply reminds me of what I was before I met Him. The futility of my life and the meaninglessness I felt. He draws to mind Psalm 84:10:

"Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked."

I don't ever want to return to the tents of the wicked - even if it means that I am merely a doorkeeper in the House of my God for the rest of my days, that in itself is the precious gift of eternal life. Life that produces eternal fruit and leads others to the Throne of Grace and renews gratitude towards my King for pulling me out of the slimy pit.

What has the enemy been planting in your backyard? What lies do you need to come out of agreement with? Have you become aware of the fruit that you've been displaying? Angry outbursts, jealousy, quarreling...and you are ready to turn from those wicked ways? It's not enough to just pray longer, read more of the Bible or attend more conferences. The enemy is planting weeds amongst the Master's wheat and if it is allowed to prosper, it will insidiously entangle itself amongst the good seed until the two are inseparable and to root out the weeds will damage the wheat. Therefore, ask Holy Spirit to reveal to you where you have allowed the enemy's seed to take root. Then repent. Ask God to forgive you for believing the father of lies over your Heavenly Father. Ask Him to tell you what the truth is and then in Jesus' Name, kick the enemy out. Know the truth, and the truth will set you free!

Root out the weeds! For Christ's sake!

Ruhani